Let us discuss the effects of divorce on children for better understanding. With an increase in the standard of life, it has become very difficult to cope up with its demands. Marriages are more susceptible to divorce than it ever was. And in the process, children are deeply affected, both emotionally and socially. The parents in their effort of trying to resolve their own issue, by separating, forget the pressure they are imposing on their children and the mental trauma they are letting their children go through for no fault of theirs.
Divorce can lead children to a devastating state. So both the parents have to take the responsibility to give emotional support to their children. Often children blame themselves for their parents' divorce. Probably, they consider themselves responsible for all the chaos that their family is going through, thinking that they had not been good to their parents which had led them to separate.
There is also a feeling of insecurity and abandonment that creeps into the psychology of the children. The fear of having lost a parent is so intense, that they fear losing the other parent too. The feeling of being abandoned by their parents and left alone to live by themselves grips their heart.
One might question, what do children have to do with the divorce of their parents. Children, as such, have nothing to do with the separation, but the experiences they go through during the process, can leave negative impact which could traumatize them. This could affect the behavior of the children. They might become aggressive because of the anger that is building within them.
Most of the times, children find difficulty in adapting to the change in their surroundings. A big change can also be noticed in the behavior pattern of the children, his behavior in school, among his peers etc. Quite often, children become very aggressive, and they find difficulty in mixing up with friends in school. However divorce does not always degrade their personality. There are also certain positive aspects.
Positive Effects of Divorce on Children
For instance Teresa, whose parents have separated when she was 9 years old, is more tolerant and flexible than her friends of her age. Children like her are more co-operative; goal oriented, and has a high motivation level.
Negative Effects of Divorce on Children
But cases like this are very rare; most of the children from a divorced family suffer from the negative impact. It has been observed that teenagers and adolescent are most affected by their parents divorce. In order to get over the frustration, they get into smoking, drinking and to the extent indulging themselves in drug addiction. As compared to boys, girls are more adaptable to the new changes that take place. Boys on the other hand, resist giving in to the change in their surrounding. They find it harder to cope up with the situation.
Parents have to be very sensible towards their children, so that, they do not lose their self confidence. Both parents must not fail in their responsibility towards them. Do not negate yourself from your children, talk to them, share ideas with them, give them emotional support for they are going through the worst phase of their life and only you can guide them to the right path.
Now, after going through all this, would you like to know how divorce benefits the children, the victims? Here are the positive effects of divorce on children which you should not miss.
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