Why do women complain so much

Updated on 16 Mar 2010, Published on 12 Jun 2008

Once, in a small family gathering, my mother was complaining to my father about my brother and was nagging him continuously. My father sat there, deep in thought, listening quietly to my mother, when all of a sudden his thoughts spoke out, “why do women complain so much?” Then and there all of us burst into a laugh which irritated my mother and she left grumbling “like father, like daughter”.

But the question struck my mind with such an intensity that I sat thinking- when it comes to complaining, why is it always associated with us alone? Its not that only we complain, men also complain but we never hear anyone asking why men complain. Or is it simply because we are more sensitive than men and seek for emotional dependance.

The moment we hear the word “woman”, the first thing that strikes our mind is someone accompanied with the gift of the gab. One who likes to brag and nag all the time, who is more interested in talking about herself, her lifestyle, her children, and her family, than being a good listener. One who can keep on talking on anything right from the lace of a petticoat to how often the woman, who lives in the next village, visits her parental home!!! (One who likes to complain about the silliest thing)

We have tagged a lot of things with a woman’s identity. But have we ever thought why women do so? Is it the law of nature for women to complain always?

The question to which most of the men would answer, is ‘yes’.

These sensitive creatures have been misunderstood on this pretext. It is not a woman actually who is always complaining, but circumstances has led her to behave like that. In a family, it isShe’ who keeps the family intact. And so each and every member of the family is kept under her scrutiny. She is always answerable to whatever good or bad happens at home. But why? Is she to be blamed for everything? Is that all fair?

When a man is being questioned, he feels that his wife is complaining, as men do not really like the idea of women interfering in their professional lives.

Being the weaker sex, they often feel insecure about themselves, as men prefer to spend most of the time outside. Which men sometimes fail to understand and this compels women to start nagging and bickering constantly. As a result of which, men develop extramarital affairs for they feel that their wives at their homes are trying to control them.

So, if we sit down and ponder upon the question above, the answer is, because men find it difficult to adjust to the desires and personality of women. There are flaws in both the sexes, however, men must try to understand what women want and compromise with them for all this, while women have been compromising with men.

But, exceptions are always there.

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66 Responses to "Why do women complain so much"

Goerge
i must say i disagree with some of the pointers above.In a true loving relationship, men compromise a lot. They understand what their woman want and do everything possible to satisfy that. YET women constantly nag. Men that love their relationship can make compromises and sacrifices in every issue that can become a big problem in their relationship. BUT NO MAN CAN COVER EVERY LITTLE DETAIL. Women always find something to complaint about. This accrues in almost every woman but the only difference is in the timing on when it happens. From the moment that a woman is in love in the relationship, she becomes OVER sensitive, way less confident and starts expecting more from her man WHICH IS OK. BUT all wise men know that the consequences of that is when a woman starts complaining even on the smallest things. When "EMOTIONS" are in place "SENSE" does not exist on a woman's mind and men have the need to make sense.

Women need to understand the FUNDAMENTAL characteristics of men and one of them is not hearing "women complaint on every little thing". Men (and by that i am only talking about the men that truly love their women and are willing to do as much as they can to maintain a happy relationship)DO understand that there are things about women that do not have an explanation and they just have to accept it. If your boy friend/husband is still with you, you need to know that they have already considered this fact and have accepted many unexplainable things about you. All women need to do is to cooperate and accept the man's fundamental needs in relationship.
Ferrari
Well, women's lives are more difficult, and I will tellyou why: we give birth and take care of the children far more than men do. Once the women gets married and especially has a child, she becomes much more vulnerable than men - it is difficult to excell in professional world, much of her interests have to be given up, if things don't work out in marriage it becomes more difficult to remarry with "baggage". Women also fall prey to their craving for love and emotional attachement, it is true addiction (as they still want to be married rather than not married inspite of all the sacrifices thay have to make). Unless you as a men do not understand this, you will not succeed in a relationship. Men rule the world, that's why they shouldn't complain. It is easier for them to change things, they don't have chains on their feet like women with children do. It is Saturday, and I am up at 5 am because I have to study for the test - taking an advance accounting course. I have to go back to work Monday - 33 miles commute each way. There will be a lot of overtime this week as it is the end of the month and the end of the year, and books need to be closed, and reports need to be prepared and analysed. I miss my children already. I will have to plan ahead and cook their meals for the week. I will have to check their homework when I get home from work. My husband was off for 10 days this last week, and he spent most of the time glued to the computer doing stupid greenscreeen photography while I had to do grocerie shopping, cleaning and laundry instead of spending time with the kids. I am thinking really hard about leaving him. And not remarrying for a while, just ejoying life with a lot of responsibility but without constant dissapointment. My husband probably thinks that I complain too much, too. Well, he will have all the time in the world for the greenscreen photography when I am gone. Unless you men learn to give birth and nurture children, do not complain - your lives are pretty good. And be compassionate with us poor souls who have to do that AND work AND take care of the house AND climb the corporate ladder because this kind of life is too hard for you – you can only do one thing at a time.
Marty
Well, there you have it. A nice, well thought out defense of the argument that for men, "it's all our fault." Thanks.
in everyones response they make one good point FEELINGS but the rest is crap me i think women will complain about almost anything and when you fix that i belive they see a opening. think i change my behavoir to fit my woman then she sees that im making changes then she wants me to change everything about myself that she hates. in a relation ship the man and woman have to both make a change. also women dont have it harder then men and i hate when they bring up birth. you dont have to have a baby i wont make you alot of women who never had a baby and also arent in a relatoin ship always uses that excuse. i wont make you have it im not saying you better have it or ill kill you. also there are drugs you can take allot of people take them and they dont go through any pain. i wont make you. also dont talk about work ferrari that doesnt count if its so hard take on another job dont take it out on you husband because you think you have to do all of that. also have a talk about the problems and both of you have to change one thing you think about each other or more but if he makes a change you have too. because you arent perfect
Man
Women complain because that's all they can do. They are too weak to change things on their own. When a man wants to change the world, he does, alone. When a woman wants to change the world, she bands together with other women (feminism) but even then they are too weak to do anything.
Other Man
Agrees WHOLEHEARTEDLY with Man. This article had no facts or support.... in fact it ended it's argument in the way most women do, hyper-babbling and complaining. Unfortunately MOST Women look great on the outside(which really when it comes down to it, most men could care less about), but have nothing there on the in. Sorry, but it's true.
a man!
to the woman thinking of leaving her husband have u thought how this will affect ur children? Stop being so self centerd & talk to ur husband if u have any feelings for him! Women are all the same I find self self self! They deserve to be alone with attitudes like that do they ever stop & think of the poor man's feelings? No they don't! Prove me wrong women!
A Man
This is a bunch of BS. I've dated wonderful women for over 3 years that never complained and we got along wonderfully. Then I've dated these women who feel entitled, who think THEY alone hold the family together (No it takes everyone it is teamwork). Some women want a man to accentuate them. Those are women I avoid. I date women whose mentality is they want a partner, best friend to compromise with and enjoy life.

Men don't see women as complaining because as you say we are the weaker sex. Some women just are loud obnoxious and complain to much. Thank God for those wonderful women who can keep their hormones from controlling their every action. Without it would be a lonely cruel world. They are all that gives me hope.
NS
Every women I ever had I was always doing more for no matter what it was. I do just as much child rearing as the girlfriend I have now, cleaning, and I pay 75% of the bills but she is still a nag and complainer. I agree women are much more self centered. If they were to treat their man better than they would get more. This is my experience with women. I think I only had one who would ever compromise with me.
avergae
Lets face it woman are ********, you can never do all the things they want, you do your best and they just have to turn around and say - well you didnt do such and such, its all a big joke they play on you. Women are more then just self-centred, all they think about is how they look to someone else ie: other women, thats all they really care about, and the fact that in their egotistical heads they say how can i change him so that i will look more envious to my friends, (yet they expect to be accepted no matter how they look) they all want to make everyone (just other women) around them jealous, what kind of person bases their life decisions on this kind of rational?

Women think they are good communicators! just because they have an opinion ( just like an *******) just because they talk so much to other women does not make them good communicators, it makes them a bigger pain in the ***, all their "Communication" comes down to is: your not good enough for me, i deserve better, i give you sex and you should give me everything else, in their heads they're thinking i want i want i want, i am a princess, i wanted to travel around the world and be seen in the best dresses, and have night after night of parties and don't you just love the phrase "I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN".

But this is only the tip of the ice berg when it comes to what's wrong with women, they are actually the reason there are so many problems in the world, they run the place, what is it thats so good about a woman? This is how they start and maintain the power in a relationship THEY COMPLAIN, simple isnt it, they are always the first ones to complain, you see if they complain first and constantly about everything and anything then they set up an expectation that they are the ones who should be appeased, and fussed over etc etc, and they put it in a guys head that they are not good enough. I have really had it with women who cant even say thank you, i love what you did for me, you never hear this from a woman.

MEN: this is what you need to do, start complaining (complain ten times more than her) about all the things she does, everything do it in a nice way with a laugh, but complain about the way she talks to the kids the way she washes the dishes, the clothes she buys, the way she looks, the choices she makes when you go shopping, everything, every time she makes a suggestion about we should do this or but this or go here or there, find fault with it, a make a point of it in a nice way, not mean not putting her down, then and only then will she feel at home, just like her mother made her feel and this is normal to a woman.

Good luck you'll need it.



Man
As a man, i support idea of most men in comments. Women are self centered, most of the time they think about themself and their own happiness. Only with time they realize that their husbands and children also derserve happiness. It is a paradox, women want marriage, then once they get married they are stuck on their own feelings, no regard for what husband wants and thinks, and they want a divorce. I will tell you guys the only way for true happiness is when your wive obeys husband and afraid of husband. Women are mistaken, men also sacrifice themselves for family, and equally caring people. It is constant nagging and complaining about lack of feeling and love that drives men to seek someone on the side.
Male
Women just enjoy the sound of their own voice.
Just another Man trying to figure it out.
OK. Alot of hurtful stuff being thrown around. Here is my opinion. Men are taught to suck it up. Carry the world on your shoulders. Women are taught that they look bad if the whole family and house are not perfect. 80% of women are feeling based creatures. that means they feel first then think second. 80% if men are Thinkers first and feelers second. He talks in logic and she talks about how everything feels. Being creatures of feeling they worry all the time and believe that if they don't take care of stuff it will not get taken care of. It is default.
Trying to get a woman to stop worrying (Nagging) is like trying to get a man to feel, FEELINGS (Yuck).
Truth is she needs to understand that His way of showing he loves you is by his Actions(Paying the bills, mowing the lawn, fixing the car, painting the house). And He needs to know that her way of loving him is to Question him constantly to help him remember everything and to make sure his plans are all going according to how she Feels he wants them to.

Unfortunately His Thinking doesn't translate into her Feeling.

Just accept that she is a controlling nagging crazy person and that he is a stubborn, unfeeling, distant ogre and you will both realize that it's ok.

Ps. This really only relates to my Lady and Myself, hope it helps anyone.
Daniel
Compromise has never helped me. If you try to find a middle ground, many women will just keep complaining until it's all done their way, and then they'll move on to the next thing. That's also why appeasement doesn't work. There's always something else to complain about.

Of course, not all women are like this. I've met quite a few who're truly a pleasure to be around, and they don't seem to complain much more than most men. They're the type I go for.

The complainers out there seem to live in quite a dismal little world, and I just don't allow them to drag me down into it with them. If something is bothering you, then fix it. For example, cutting people who complain too much out of your life. See? It's not that hard.

I've also noticed that giving a woman a plan to fix whatever she's complaining about will more often than not upset her more than anything. It seems as though many women are more interested in having their pain recognized than actually resolving the issue, which doesn't make any sense to me.
Robert
Obviously written by a woman, you can tell without hearing about the family story lol. People don't have to complain, they do it, it's a behaviour, a habit that you have to learn to get out of, let's not make it more complicated or think up of excuses.
Justice
Women are the weaker sex? They nag and bicker, leading men to have affairs? Was this written in the 50's?
freeloader
haha i agree with justice.

anyway, its probably just up to society. people think they are who they want to be but its really up to society. in other cultures women act differently because thats how its "supposed to be"
all people are like this, no one really wants to be themselves, no one really even sees who they are. just become a product of society and want what other tell them to be (successful)
married w/children
My wife travels- works part time and is away full time. I am the primary care taker of the children and primary provider. My wife has never gotten up in the night to attend to the children and rarely plays with the children. She sleeps 10 or more hours a day, plays on the computer and watches soap operas when she is not at work. I am working 2 jobs, caring for my girls, cooking, cleaning and everything else.
She nagged me to have children to the point of sleep deprivation. After she pumped them out motherhood ended.
Her want list is enormous and always has some complaint. She's says I/m no help. Ha Ha. Another example of a warped female perception of reality.
I have one peice of advice for any single man- Absolutely never marry. Keep using that__ and when she mentions marriage dump her. All your money, hobbies, sense of self and any enjoyment will be taken from you when you make her an "honest woman". You will be strangled to death slowly. Women's instinctive insecurity rots every relationship they have... Men are better off alone with a non serious relationship that fulfills their needs. Women are the weaker species- they are not able to live alone. They are scared insecure little beings.
some other man
well you can try and try to give a woman all the things she wants and yet it seems that she will still cheat, lie, and then complain about every little detail... im not saying every woman is like this but it seems most have been trained in this manner not even thinking of the man but of what she wants not even realizing that the man has gave up everything for her and drops everything to please her weather it makes sence to him or not (and yes men have a strong need for things to make sence where-as a woman seems to just follow her pure emotions not even thinking of the consiquinces or how it effects others) it infact seems that the more you try the more tiny details she can find untill finaly it strikes your last nerve...
Tom
All the responses in defense of this article deal with marriages. Not only are they one sided argument but they fail to take into account that no two people are alike.

In the article the author says """Or is it simply because we are more sensitive than men and seek for emotional dependance."""

Oh so its set you are more sensistive? That is total bs first off all, i have dated women who were very sensistive and some who were total bitches. Not to mention sensitivity and selfishness are two very different things.

Being sensitive and thinking the whole world owes you something is quite different. I am a very sensitive person but not once in my life have i made someone feel like they "really owe me something" Or they need to treat me a certain way.

""" Being the weaker sex, they often feel insecure about themselves, as men prefer to spend most of the time outside""""

Being the weaker sex in what way? Physically sure, mentally i don't think so. And yes men do like to go out with their friends once in awhile. I am pretty sure that most married husbands with children do not spend most of their time hanging out with friends outside. I think you are projecting your personal life.

The difference between men and women is that women are selfish. They get jelous when men have fun with other people. How childish is that, really? Men like it when their girlfriends spend time with friends and have a good time because we want you to be happy. Everybody knows that one person cannot be everything for another, it is just not possible. Women on the other hand love resorting to this when it comes to these matters.

Shane
I typed 'why do women always complain' and Googled it for a laugh because my girlfriend had been moaning again and again for no apparrant reason. I checked this thread and one previous and both had a long, rambling and interestingly complaint filled rant by one Ferrari.
I'm am nearly certain that if I was alone and bitter as she is(I'd bet my house she is) that I would spend my whole time searching the web with a fine tooth comb looking for, ironically, things to complain about.
As I said, I found this thread as a laugh with no intention of joining in an argument but having seen her name pop up twice I can only say that although my girlfriend has the odd moan I can live happily from now on in the knowledge that she will never be even close to the spinster that is Ferrari. And for that, you miserable cretin, I thank you.
B.M.Kumar
Most women want the Men to Compromise for any situation given.Well if Men accept and live on, then you have the critic in the form of your wife moving around with that magnifying glass to check, and point out the mistakes,well Men compromise.Then you are regularly greeted back home with a scene where your wife, and the Child have just had an unwanted, silly,stupid, illogical, arguments that leaves the house, and all the moods in a mess.Men compromise.Finally the health ailments.Somehow they seem to haunt the women folk in present continuous tense.Men compromise ,and take up all the chores.Still when the neighbor drops in , you are in the limelight for all the ridicules,standing jokes, and so on.... now should MEN COMPROMISE???
Crazy Lady
I found this article because I was trying to figure out why the hell I’m so crazy. All I found out was that I'm probably going to die alone.
Why am I this way and how do I change?
I hate that I nag my boyfriend and I hate that I push him away. I want to stop complaining and just be normal. I don't do these things with the intention to harm it just seems to pop in my head and right out my mouth before I can even think about it. I want to just sew my mouth shut it’s so frustrating. I don’t see how if effects him till it’s too late.
Sorry men for all us crazy women, I hope to be the type of woman that a man WANTS to be around.
For now I'll just keep coping with it by sparking up another joint.
A Rational Man
Well...

This is an interesting situation - I would imagine in the next 100 years or so - if the Rapture doesn;t come first - that many men will simply choose artificial girlfriends as mates.

Although I love my wife I can really see the appeal - and I guess it goes both ways - as women can enjoy having artificial men who are good listeners and do every chore they require.

I think that - as much as it appals me intellectually - that Human women were never designed to be equal to men - as they don't truly like to have equal partnerships with men - while men are mostly down for a little compromise/co-dependence.

Sometimes I worry that I will never truly relate to my daughter - as I am unusually dispationate even for a man - and she is already exhibiting emotional based "magical" thinking.

Perhaps - in a few decades - I will build some artificial creatures whom I can bequeath my wisdom and rationality to.

Thankfully my sexual realtionship with my wife is quite fulfilling - and makes up for other inadequacies.
me
here's the paradox, at times when the situation is uncompromisable, and a woman wants to compromize? isnt this as good as giving in? man never like giving in a relationship becuase these spells losing of free will to act. isnt these afterall what it mean for a good relationship to work is when a man loses his freewill to act?
Brynjar
...and thus did the Great War of the Sexes continue on all fronts.
Pg
Googled this topic for help.

No help here. Just that all women complain and I married one of the worst.

Now I know why the divorce rate is so high.
Ds
Women need to understand that guys need some time away to they dnt nned to be attached to our leg the whole day, Sry but we have **** to do when u start getting nagged at the best thing to do is put on a straight face and just agree until they finally give up on nagging at u, WE ARE MEN WE HAVE BETTER **** shit to do than to listin to that
Ds
Im sry but i gotta say 1 more thing. Ferrari who cares that women have babies not our fault u coulda said no or not had kids, but talking ur about to leave ur husband on some blog WOW! super low and that is the point that the men are trying to make on this blog GIRLS like Ferrari, see how long u make it on ur own without ur husband paying child support I think that the point on this is pretty much made " WOMEN JUST LOVE TO NAG" like guys love to watch sunday football on the big screen without being interrupted.
Jay
Women's complaining is just part of the deal.

Ever noticed that women expect their men to be GOD? You know, they start demanding that their man is this and that and the other thing... they give you this list of 356,189 things their man should be or do perfectly.

Go to match.com to see what I'm talking about. Of course many of these women, who are otherwise very attractive, find themselves alone in their 30s because they f-ing expect GOD to come down from the heavens.

I guess it does tie in to the complaining... unreal expectations. What are girls being put into their heads that they become such unrealistic people?

Another thing I must add: do women want a man or a human Prozac? They demand we are 100% positive 100% of the time. Really? What planet do you live in? If you ladies can't stick with a man in good and bad (and bad will happen and we men will not be positive all the time coz we be human ya know) then you are trash and deserve to be lonely.

We men are not saints (that's another topic) but neither are women.
Terri
Well I think if women wanted to live like most men -without nurturing and in a crappy old unkept house than that would fix everything- But women want to share love, and comfort those around them w/ feelings and material things, and lots of women use the words of God sacrificially - doing for others!! Women just do not want men to undue all that they slaved so hard to do in helping others, before themselves-that is when they complain!!!!
sandra
men are complete raving idiots. The male posts here prove it.
I do everything for my wife. I
COOK
LEAN
STUDY FOR HER
PAY FOR HER STUDIES
Go WITH HER FOR VEG MARKET
LEFT ALL MY FRIENDS
LEFT MY AGED PARENTS TO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES
LEFT MY CULTURE
ANY THING SHE ASK I WILL BUY HER
I WILL TELL HER I WILL DO ANYTHING SHE LIKE
but not to NAG.
She can not stop nagging.
I told her to stop nagging;
I even requested her to leave me and I will give half of what I have earned in my life. I will even help her find new man in her life.
SHE DOES NOT WANT TO LEAVE and DOES NOT STOP NAGGING.

I decided I will never have kids.
I have one advice for People who are getting married or married. STOP trying to please women, just tell her, if you want to be with me, keep you mouth shut. I will marry you, if you do, what ever I say you to do. Stay alone, date them and get rid of them. Take my advice you will not regret.
blublondgrl
First off let me start with I am a female. And I came to this site because I have had my hubby ask me several times in the last five years that we have been together, why don't you argue with me. lol. And honestly I am like huh? every time. He tries to start fights with me and I am like why do you do this and he says because he wants to have make up sex lol and if we don't argue then we can never have it.

Pardon me please I know that I talk in circles, i confuse myself. ;)

After reading this I could not help but to throw in my two cents. Woman are going to kill me for this, but it needs to be said. I am a woman and to be honest, I don't understand woman. I have tried to understand them, but frankly I can not. It is to hard and gives me a headache, all I can be is myself and I like me just that way. I have never considered myself the weaker sex. I fix my own cars, take out trash ect... If I see it needs to be done I do it. It is a part of life for me, so i don't complain about it, I fix it, to me that is only common sense. If you see a problem do something about it, it does not take a discussion, and ladies pay attention to that, it might help you one day. and stop complaining about having babies, I agree with the men here, if you don't want them then don't have them. no one makes you that was your choice and you knew what you where up against when you thought about being a mommy. I have three, I work from home, so i am home with my kids all the time, my hubby works long hours so he is hardly home so i do it all. oh well get over it it is life ladies, we are all doing what we have to make it in this world. that is all. so shut up and make the best of it. with a man or alone you still have to keep your home clean unless you are nasty. woman you are nagging because you are not getting things your way, well what makes you think that men are always getting there way, they are human just like you, and need a peace of mind, and yes ladies that peace of mind needs to be away from you, home and the family life. don't worry they will be back. we all need time away from each other.

I can not speak for every lady or man here i can only speak from my personal experience. my hubby has friends and he has hobbies, he likes to hunt fish ect.. that is fine, i like for him to go out and enjoy himself sadly due to the way that woman are i have no friends to go see or hang out with. and woman did this. you are all so jealous it is crazy, the grass always looks greener on the other side. but trust me it is not. yes i had to sacrifice a lot for my hubby and my kids but i love them all and am willing to do what ever it takes for my family, just as my hubby does too. it is a game of give and take. it is not always going to be peachy and you are not always going to be happy, first off ladies stop looking to your man to make you happy, he cant do nothing to make you happy until you are happy with yourself. if you are not happy with you then he is doomed from the beginning, and i feel sorry for the poor feller, nothing he does is going to make you happy, you are looking in the wrong places for happiness, get first from with in, and then he will be able to see that pretty smile on your face that he fell in love with.

after marriage and kids things do change, but you have to have a positive attitude about it. it is all in how you look at something that makes the difference. learn to expect your man for who he is, you knew who he was when you got yourself into it, don't go into a relationship thinking you can change him. expect his flaws, no one is perfect. we are only human. stop trying to out do what others have. be who you are, and stop trying to impress your man, you have already done that, there is no need to keep on, you are only going to dis encourage him. Think about it ladies, put yourself in the mans shoes, if you try and try and try over and over and again, and it does not work, you do what, "give-up" well guess what so will he. and that is what they have done. stop giving woman a bad name. it is not the men doing it, it is you doing to yourself. and guess what not only you have to suffer it all of us do. Other good woman have to reep what you sew. and it makes our lives harder. like i have said i have no friends. i do not like how other woman talk, act or anything else about them. honestly it makes me sick to my stomach because i am in the same species, you don't have to be the weaker sex, you are only that because you choose to be, but only you can change that, like i have said if something is wrong stop looking to him to fix it, he is not god, he is just a man just as you are just a woman. don't depend on men to do it all for you, you do have to do things for yourself. and if you start to do things for yourself then you might get some confidence in your life and that will help you deal with the issues that you have. it is not rocket science ladies, it is all common sense. i know us woman suffer pms, but that is a part of our life, there is nothing we can do about it, and that is not your mans fault either, so why take it out on him. when things seem to touch and you are about to pull your hair out, you have to take a stand and not let your emotions get the best of you and let them take control over you. you have to be the boss and beat it down. you have to find something to occupy your time. maybe go for a walk, or just go riding around that is what i do. and i also love to play video games, give it a try. ladies there is nothing wrong with you having hobbies just as he does. your man wants you to have your own things, but for some reason woman refuse to. i don't get it. and another thing ladies, i don't know what it is so this is just a guess, but it seems to me that you afraid of being "the little lady" and that is what causes a lot of the problems, and you feel that men are superior to you, they are not and they know that they are not, if you have a good man, he is going to listen to you, if you talk like you got some sense, i am not going to listen to anyone that does not talk like then have some sense either. get a grip, and take control, trust me the men will be so happy if you do. put it to the test, you will see. I promise you that.

Ok now to you men. i understand where you all are coming from. you just want to live a simple life, and men are very simple while woman are complicated. and you know you guys are right the woman are trying to change you for bragging rights. and another thing, when your wife or gf start in on you, i know that it is hard to listen to a person that seems out of control. makes you want to put your head through a wall or shot yourself to get out to the misery. but what it boils down to, your woman thinks that her life is harder than yours in some cases. and that is because from my point of view that is what she wanted. woman are always putting down each other, and in competition with each other, i have had to live it with my whole life and i did with out a lot of things, because i would not subject myself to that. i hate it with every fiber of my being. guys you are being rational, yes i will give you that, but what gets me you guys is don't put us all down, i know hard to believe but not all woman are like that. and i am not weaker than you and you and you are not better than me. we are equals. just to bad not every one sees it that way. we all have hard lives, no one said that life is going to be easy. i will tell you that one mistake a woman makes with you guys and that is where all of this starts. woman are so emotional that when they meet you ect.. and decide that they are going to love you, (i am one who thinks that you don't fall in love, you fall in a ditch), but you choice to love a person) woman drop everything that have and who they are for you, the woman love you so much that they change everything and they do at first make you the center of there universe and in exchange they expect the same thing out of you, and when you don't do that all hell breaks loose. i really do think that is what it all boils down too. and most woman to choice to stay home with the kids and take care of the house, and after a while of doing that, it does drive you crazy, and it is harder for woman to find true friends than it is for a man, because of how woman are. woman can not trust each other, and that is why woman are always putting each other down ect.. it is sad really, i so wish that it could be different. and you poor guys never know what hit you, at first she is cool and fun to be around, and then wam a shot to the gut and your head is spinning around and around, and two yrs later you are still wondering what just happen. but really it is where the woman makes you her world. that is a mistake on the woman's part. no one is no ones else center of the universe, and no human is god. woman need to stop worshiping over you lol, and worship the real god at work here. mass hysteria go figure, and to take up for the woman, when that time of the month comes around, your hormones are everywhere, not only is she driving you crazy and makes you want to get away from her, but she also wishes that she could get away from herself, and the reason that you hear so much complaining from her is because like i said woman don't have true friends, so we have no one to talk to you but you guys, or our mother, so you put the puzzle together.

i don't have a clue how to make it better between the battle of the sexes i wish i did, but we have here is failure to communicate. that is all it is,

ladies, stop complaining and fix things and stop looking to him to do it all for you, and take charge of your life. get Cinderella out of your head, this is not a fairy tale this is real life. he is not your knight and shinning armor and he never will be, he is human. he is going to make mistakes, and he is gong to make you mad, don't wait until you have bottled up all that anger and then complain, if you see a problem go ahead right then and there and tell it like it is. trust me he does, that is what makes men so simple. and trust me it is great. he has feelings, but not the way that you do. you always worry about what is he thinking, does he love me ect..

trust me ladies he does not go around everywhere worrying about weather or not you love him or what you are thinking, he is to afraid to ask you what you are thinking. when your man is getting off work and ready to come home, don't make it to wear he dreads coming home. that is bad for him and you too and kids if you have any. make the home a happy place. if you are wiling to change and pull your head out of your own a** then he will do that too. you are not on an petastal. so get off your high horse and join us back here at what i know of as planet earth. men are great people, give them a chance and you will see that for yourself. stop sweating the small stuff. there are to many important things out there that needs your attention, don't change what you cant. learn to except things for the way that they are, and yourself. love you for who you are. hold your head up high, and think positive. if you have problems talk it over with him, but don't complain when he don't give you the answer that you where looking for, just because you where looking for it does not mean that was the right one. work together with your man as a team. do for each other and take care of each other and stop keeping score, and old dirt, leave that in the past, don't keep throwing it up in there faces, you don't want that done to you. do your best that is all you anyone can do.

men love your woman, and talk to her, try to work with her and her rage and emotions. hopefully together with rational minds, you can work things out.

good luck

now time for you guys and ladies to cuss me out lol,
reeses
Like seriously, there are a lot of reasons why women complain, nagg or act crazy. This is just one of a million reasons why women complain that some MEN are too stupid to even think before they act, they usually act before they think.

If you date a woman who doesn't complain she wont complain, but if you do her wrong in any way, trust she'll complain, and nagg about the little stuff, because you just opened a whole new side of her, that she didn't know it existed.
Tiki Tavi
Hi. I found this site after running a search on "how to deal with women complaining." I was looking for this site because I was recently engaged to a woman whose complaining was a MAJOR part of why we started encountering problems and ultimately grew apart. And I am in the early stages of another relationship who just recently started to—you guessed it—complain.

Why do so many women complain? And the kind of complaining I'm talking about isn't "inside" complaints what their man will or will not do, but rather "outside" complaints, or the kind of complaining that's about things the woman could change or do something about (like issues at work), but she would apparently rather complain, incessantly, about those issues than do anything about them.

Shortly before my fiancee dumped me this summer—believe me, the details are something I should be complaining about! let's just say that Jerry Springer reject broke up with me out of the blue and over the phone, after I stood by her through all her BS and while she was an absolute MISERY to be with/be around during grad school—anyway, shortly before the breakup, I went to see a female therapist, thinking that I might be able to start repairing the relationship by working through any of my own communication issues, those that might be affecting how we related to and communicated with one another. Her parents are therapists, and so are most of their friends, so I went alone, despite her suggestion that we go together, thinking that going to therapy with my fiancee could quickly turn defensive and ugly, as she's much more familiar with that world than I'll ever be.

Anyway, I talked a lot with this therapist, A LOT, about my ex's complaining. Her advice? Keep in mind that when she complains that she doesn't actually want your help arriving at a solution to whatever problem she is complaining about. Even offering to help won't necessarily stop the stream of complaining. Men really are more "target-oriented"; women tend to mistake "constant complaining" with "consistent and healthy communication." If you asked my ex about our communication, she would use the word "problematic"; if you ask me, I would at some point definitely use the phrase "constant complaining."

There are men who, like me, fall in love with a woman so hard that ALL they want to do is make her happy. I really think that there is a under-reported number of such men—I'd actually bet that a majority of straight men fall into that category. I know that when I fall in love with a woman, I experience this overwhelming urge and need to make her happy. But at some point, I want a woman to let me know that she appreciates the things that I do and the sacrifices that I make for her/us. And sometimes it seems that the more a man does/sacrifices for a relationship, especially if he's in one with a woman who either will not or cannot pull her own "weight" in that regard, the more likely it is that at some point this woman will start to complain, A LOT. My theory about that sort of complaining is that it is firmly connected to the woman's own sense of inadequacy; she knows that her man is doing more than she is, so to keep him from realizing this and possibly becoming resentful, she starts complaining about things that she could change as if those things were mind-boggingling, absurdly difficult catch-22s.

I think that the more a man likes and/or loves a woman, the harder it can be for him to take her complaining, and here I'm talking about "outside" complaints, those things that the woman herself could actually do something about. By "outside" complaining, I also mean those complaints about things that are simply part of life—things that everyone has to deal with all the time. A major problem with me and my ex is that she'd complain about something so much, and get crazily emotional about it and start crying and acting despondent over it (she'd call me sometimes after a bad day and the first thing that she'd that say is "I'm thinking about driving my car into a ditch"), that I would go into immediate panic mode—my heart would actually start racing. From the moment that I met this woman, all I ever wanted was to make the her happy, so it pained me to see her absolutely in tears over something that was easy to change or address. She would complain about a job that she chose to accept and that was in no way mandatory for her to take on; she would complain about a project that she elected to extend into a big, complex deal, despite the fact that a paper would've sufficed for that relatively unimportant assignment. She would complain about grad school overall, and would gripe constantly and loudly and tearfully about wanting to drop out, despite the fact that her program would've let her drop out or take a leave of absence at any time. (And in the end? Of course she has left me for another guy with whom started sleeping with and got pregnant by almost immediately after we broke up, and she has decided to have the baby, marry him, and live a life that in no way would've required that she'd earned that graduate degree!)

Another bad "habit" of my ex was complaining instead of working, which would make the work pile up ... which of course would lead to ever more intense and pressurized complaining—which would eventually become the sole content of any communication between us. Work took her away, and eventually, complaining about work, and then complaining about me, occupied most of the communication that took place in the limited amount of time that we spent together. It only made things worst that the reason her work would often pile up is because she would often overbook herself, taking on more work than practically any human being would be able to handle. Of course, in the end she slogged through all that work and got it done ... but in the process, she totally snuffed the life out of our relationship—and if you asked her, she would be the first to admit that.

The strong, talented, beautiful woman that I was originally attracted to became a simpering, complaining, overly emotional wreck. And then came the demands, including in the bedroom, where demanding is usually the absolute worst way to get what you want (you can't "demand" that a man, or a woman, be ready or in the mood for have sex). Pretty soon what had started with complaining about "outside" things became a steady stream of complaints about "inside" things, including sex, which had also gone sour due to her constant depression- and anxiety-filled complaining. The complaining, and the fact that it would not/did not stop, made me less attracted to her over time, which absolutely saddened me—but I never left, and I did not step out on her. Instead, after the first year of this, not this past summer but the one before, I got down on one knee and proposed to her (we were together before her first year of grad school, but broke up when she moved away; I then moved across the country to rekindle things with her, and we were then together for the remaining two years of her graduate program). I put a ring on her finger and stuck around for another year, thinking, "This woman did not complain this way before grad school; all we need to do is make it to the summer that she graduates, when we can reconnect outside all of the pressure that she's been facing." I thought that once she was done, the complaining would stop, that we would then be able to reconnect and work things out. But of course she graduated and then chose and leave me, for a guy she just met.

Did I ask my ex to seek therapy? YES. But she's an artist and wouldn't take antidepressants/anti-anxiety medication because she was worried that it affect her creativity (which is the worst excuse ever for not taking medication). Did I offer her advice on how to resolve the "outside" issues that she complained about; did I suggest that she stop overbooking herself, so that she did not repeatedly face the problems that come with overextending yourself? Of course I did, and by now, you should know that those suggestions weren't taken in a positive way. Did I try, as at least one person here has suggested, to complain right back to her? Yes, but despite the fact that my life was in some ways harder than hers (I'm a college professor, she was a grad school student; I commuted 2 hours each way, sometimes 2-3 times a week, in order to live in the same house with her, while she was a student a university that was about 15 minutes from our house), I could not for the life of me complain with anything near the baseline intensity of her complaining. (That difference between us, some folks have told me, might have to do with the fact that I was the first of five children while she was an only child; I often reply that that sort of complaining is a sure sign of a person who was, in their childhood, over-indulged.)

The long and short of it is this: Women, be aware that you do have a tendency to complain, and if you overdo it you will stand a chance of snuffing out a relationship. Sometimes, the real problem in a relationship that fizzled out due to what you women call "communication issues" was really an excessive amount of the woman's complaining. Men, realize that a lot of women complain, so much that it sometimes seem that it is simply in their nature to complain. If you can't deal with a woman's complaining, at this point in my life I think that the best, smartest idea would be to do this: Let that woman know, in no uncertain terms, that her complaining is very likely to lead to the end of the relationship. Let her know—and be frank and forthright—that the more she complains about things that she can actually do something about, the less you will listen to her because you will start to assume that whenever she starts complaining, what she's really doing is whining.

Tell her that. And I say if she can't handle it when you do tell her that, then for the love of God, leave her and find someone else, someone who doesn't confuse "communication" with "complaining." And realize that the woman you are leaving behind very clearly needs to find another guy—someone who will listen to her whine all day and night, like that continuous, high-pitched sound is but the sweetest music in the world.

Best wishes everyone,
Tiki Tavi
Bypassone
The bottom line in here, after reading most of the comments, resumes to this:
a) women don't wanna change their behaviour - EVER!
b) women want to change their partners' behaviours - ALWAYS!
c) if you disagree with the above, you're obviously a woman!
kingroth
well im not fullly employed now due to economy but i worked saved hard lost me job my misus was always nagging me so i asked her what where are all the things she ever wanted so i went out bought her all the things she wanted did all the housework went everywhere with her did as much as anyone could do masages flowers fine restaurants listened to her asked her how she was feeling all that stuff trying to be a gentleman and now she still complains about everything and she actually does nothing for me and im still paying i could nearly commit suicide listening to her complain and talk bullshit incessently and if i have a problem its nothing to her but a little spot on her face is more important than me having migranes lately 2 years im doing everything and listening to her crap so i cant take any so i told her i dont want to listen to anymore stupid crap and do her own stuff and shee called me a shovanist pig after everthing i done for he i just want to kill her so im planning to leave her she is after changing my whole outlook on women i use to think they where gods gift to men no i just think that they are from the devil and why are most women stupid and why do really really stupid women think there so clever why dont women listen to me why cant they follow ssimple instructions and why cant they ever give you the answer to question you asked and why when you ask a women these questions does she call you a sovanist pig
John
I don't know why women nag so much. For example, I told my mother I would fix my aunty's computer on Sunday. So on Saturday she asks if I'm going to fix his computer tomorrow and roughly what time. I told her Sunday night after dinner. I do a variety of things on Sunday, and when I get home, she asks me "why don't you go now so you don't have to later?". I told her at the beginning of the week that I can only fix it on the weekends but throughout the week she brings it up like I'm a moron that has the memory of a fish.
Dude
I must say that the blog above is by extensive means overly opinionated. Obviously women believe they have the hardest jobs, have more stress than any body on the planet and they also feel they must talk about it. Unfortunately the conversation of "who has it worse" will go in circles. The Good news is i have an answer. The Answer is simple. Men are a better species. If women could be just like men, in character and attitude, but with vaginas and feminine physiques... Yes the world would be a better place.
Anonymous Male
Here's my tidbit on this.

My wife and I have equally challenging and stressful jobs. We both share the household duties equally. We each do our own laundry, as do our kids. We trade off on chores like vaccuuming and mopping. In the bathrooms I clean the toilets, and she does the sinks and counters. The only area that I don't pull my own weight is with cooking, but only because I suck at it. My wife on the other hand is a great cook. In turn, I do the yard work, trash, pool care, and tend to the pets, because those are things she does not want to do.
It's a give and take. Most of the time.
Here's where we differ. On any given week, even though I do as much as she does, she still complains about what isn't done. For example, if I clean the dishes, then the carpet needs vacuuming. If I vacuum the carpet, the dog needs a walk. If I walk the dog, the kids need to be put to sleep. If I put the kids to sleep, the bathroom is a mess. Etc etc etc...do you see the pattern?

I bring this up and she says she doesn't complain. So this weekend, I made a little experiment. While she was out of the house visiting family, I chose not to go. Instead I spent the entire Saturday cleaning the kitchen, organizing the office paperwork that was piling up, vacuumed, did 3 loads of everyone's laundry, took out the trash, put away leftover holiday stuff, walked the dog, and fixed the computer.

She came home and was impressed.

The very next morning, "why didn't you fix the sprinklers?"

Test result: women will always find something to complain about. Men, no matter how much you get done it will never be enough and if it's not her way you'll hear about it!!!

And by the way. Today I fixed the sprinklers. And tomorrow just like clockwork, she will find something else to complain about. I'll keep ya'll posted.

Paul
I don't care what sex you are. There is no excuse for complaining. Period.
Gavin
"Well, women's lives are more difficult"

Oh look, a woman complaining about how hard women have it, as if women are innocent victims. GO FIGURE.

"and I will tellyou why: we give birth and take care of the children far more than men do."

Women CHOOSE to give birth, it is a CHOICE that a woman makes, so you can't say "women have harder lives because we give birth.", because giving birth is a CHOICE.

You want some FACTS about who's lives are harder? How about men who are expected to earn high amounts money to support the family? No wonder men:

1) Have higher rates of suicide at all ages
2) Die in higher rates *from all causes* that women.
3) Have higher blood pressure, more heart attacks, etc.

Women will complain about how "bad they have it", even while they float on a cloud drinking martini's and having GQ models rubbing their feet. It's in women's nature, and it's the reason why MEN DON'T LISTEN TO WOMEN.

If you don't believe me, here's some more FACTS:

What is Feminism? A MILLION WOMEN COMPLAINING.
Alex
"Why do women complain 'too' much?" is a different question than "Why do woman complain 'so' much?"

The answer to the last question leads to the answer of the first. The answer is to the last question is "because they can". Males will complain as much unless socialized not to. Gay males complain more than most women. They are just as over-critical. Gay men know that women like 'adulation'. They like to be worshipped and pandered to. It makes them 'feel' special.

Men are socialized not to BE SPECIAL. think "you're in the ARMY now dog-shit!!! drop and give me 20!!!'" Men are socialized not to be "self-referential". We are socialized to subdue our emotions. Ignore noise, focus on the task. Women are taught to be "self-referential" and "relationship centric".

The answer to the first question is, because they have been allowed to. Basically, 'too' much complaining needs to be "bitch-slapped" into silence, like a man with a 'careless' weidling his arms needs to be calmed down. Over agressive men need to be pacified, over complaining women need to be silenced. Never with a closed hand. If you are good and dextrous enough, just cut off the vocal chords long enough to remind her brain that "talking is a right of the living, not the dead" . If you don't draw the line, and protect the line, the line will be crossed. HUMAN NATURE. regardless of GENDER.

Also, it's been proven that in some cases, over-complaining or bitchiness is a sign they just want sexual attention.
chuk a spear
I made the classic mistake of violating my own rules,,marrying a female my own age in maturity,,Ignoring red flags,the complaining,constant nagging being unbearable.My younger female interests constantly re enforce my mistake.The relief they provide is wonderful.once a female reaches a certain age the baggage cant be unloaded,,marraige is an imperfect thing,best left to past ages.
Sam I am
My wife nags and complains from the morning on. No matter what it is she finds a reason to complain and nag nag nag!!!! So she wants me to exercise more but when I go to the gym she says I left her alone.... (well how the $&@$ am I supposed to exercise without leaving your side?) I ask her to come with me she declines?????

Forget my long story, bottom line is Almost ALL women have a serious problem. Best thing to do is to have gf-s, date and then drop them like a bad habit. They just don't stop.

Reasons why a women nags

1 they like to hear themselves talk
2 they feel inferior
3 they are unhappy with themselves
4. They don't know what they want in life
5. ....
6. .....
blublondgrl, I LOVE YOU!
I know you're married. Not that type of love; An innocent friend/brother/sister type of love. Tell your husband that us guys said to be happy you don't argue with him. There's nothing wrong with that. My first love never argued with me either and it was great! Other women like you do exist, as do four-leaf clovers. So you also shouldn't give up on finding compatible female friends.

You spoke a lot of sense, so thank you for stepping forward and letting us guys know we are appreciated. You are man's new best friend. If anyone tries to cuss you out for what you said, let me know and they've got to cuss me out too, and probably a lot of other guys too.

It sound like the other people here didn't read what you wrote (it was kinda long), but they should read it. Case closed. As for the women who do have the complainnag gene, I don't know what the solution is for that. They can be very nice great women, but that problem can be so hard to deal with when it arises. Maybe lifelong weekly counseling or a support group or something would help. Maybe you could start something... please, would you! Men around the world would love to hear her holler out "Honey, I'm going to my CA meeting now!" (CA=Complainers Anonymous). He'll pay for that!

I know that some women admit that they hate the fact that they compulsively complain, but can't stop themselves doing it. Now I'm not talking about the ones with guys who are giving them real reasons to complain (that does happen), but petty stuff, or imaginary problems that only exist in their own mind.

You should start a research project for that. We can all pay our extra change at the grocery store register for that.

i hate everything
My wife quit her job to stay at home with our kids and run a daycare. Now she doesn't complain about her crappy job anymore! HOORAY! Instead she complains about her daycare kids, parents, boredom, wear on the house. AND now the house is full of little girls complaining and fighting. .. sorry.. have to stop typing.. female co-worker is verbally stabbing my ear about the crappy meal she had last night.. Gotta leave the office for lunch now.
d man
women r never happy cause they are selfish
Julius Caesar
A very humourous blog about a woman complaining about complaining. I would say that this is poeticly ironic and, frankly, confirms the stereotype even more so. The line that took the cake for me was, "In a family, it is ‘She’ who keeps the family intact." Indirectly, this statement attacks men more than it trumps women & it is sorely inaccurate. Women do not keep the family intact, nor do men. It is US, read again ladies, US ; Man + Woman = Stable family. Do you not like that equation? Take it up with nature.

It is these baseless, emotionally charged implusive statements, from women, that make things very difficult. More so than they have to be.

I hate to label women selfish, uncaring, self-centered and disciminatory towards who they love but the fact is ; it's all true.

Gentlemen, I propose a experiment, one that will show you the true character of the woman in your life.
Fellas, find your most unattractive ugly guy friend. Have him respectfully approach a beautiful woman that you're interested in. Have him try to pick up on her but have him do so with impeccible conduct as to not allow that woman any ammo in her gun.

If she is a good woman, I mean good to the heart. No matter how ugly that guy might be, if she is a good woman she WILL not rip that guy to shreds and leave him walking away with his nut sack in his hands. She will respectfully decline his offer and leave the man with some dignity as he walks away.

However, if she does rip that guy a new asshole for being gutsy enough to approach her, respectfully i might add....She is a cold hearted, seflish, unappreciative woman that you should drop immediately because you know how she treats people whom she sees as inferior.

If a woman cannot show respect and decency to someone who she preceives as "inferior", drop her fellas, drop her fast and quick or you'll end up with ur heart stomped on and ur nut sack in ur hands.

It's a brilliant plan and will put any woman, even one you thought was "amazing" right on the spot. Don't be dissapointed if she fails this test because from my research ; only 1 out of every 10 women has true "womanly" character. The other 9 you can fuck but the 1 that has "womanly" character, thats the one you marry, have a family with and give your all to because you know this is the very best type of woman there is.
Woman
Gross painting of sexes with a large brush. Not all men are jerks and not all women are nagging complaining pains in the arse. Seems to me that neither sex has any respect for the other. It's not that men are all at fault or that women are all selfish and controlling (because, I certainly know that if I'm not available to my husband at times, he can be just as insecure, complainy and needy as any "woman")Perhaps this is simply a human trait? Looks like men complain as much as women - read the above. Good examples of complainy men complaining about complainy women. When men and women can start trying to understand where each is coming from, then we may be on the road to some peace between the sexes. If everyone on this planet is walking around with such negative views of the opposite sex, they can be guaranteed to never have a wonderful, blissful union. Ever.
person
women spend their entire lives complaining because they never get told to shut the f&%$ up. Dudes can't pull that shit after age 6. As a guy you need to be socially mature asap or you get beat up, picked on or bullied. Women believe theyre mature but its all a fassade. They compliment each other when they dont mean it at all. Keep it real ladies and you wont have the drama that makes your brains melt down and you become rediculous. I think hormones are used as an excuse but i dont buy it. Ive got two kids and every woman i know is like my kids mentally. I guess women were never forced to grow up and become big girls. How many women have any kind of b***s at all? Go Hillary Clinton at least you aren't a big whining useless pain in the a**. From what i can tell most women are children in adult bodies. But they ACT the opposite. Pretty good acting girls, but we know your secret .
another person
it's kind of stupid how the men are complaining about women in most of the comments, but they are saying that women are the ones who complain. i think that both sexes complain, both sexes are selfish, both have differences that are easily compromised, but it's hard getting both to calm down and work it out.

i'm not saying this applies to everyone, but the roles that men and women play in a family are equally stressful and hard, just in different ways. stop thinking about how hard you have it and realize that you are not the only person in the world.

"person" it's funny that you believe all guys have to be socially mature, really?? have you MET any mature guys under 30?? women have emotions and they act on them, it has nothing to do with being a kid mentally. you only say that because kids act on their emotions, as boys grow up, they are taught socially that it is acceptable to hide their emotions. we are all human beings, the fact that women are more sensitive does not mean that they are kids.

i sure hope you dont tell your women to stfu, you must not have had parents to teach you how to talk to someone and respect them as equals and partners in a relationship.

i think that it works both ways. i think some women need to calm down and stop complaining and do something about the problems, and i think that men need to understand that they are not the only person in the world, they have to know that just because they are okay with something doesn't mean the whole world should be okay with it too.

there's two people in a relationship. it works both ways. problems affect both of you. communication isn't a one-way street. don't ignore problems because you think it'll just go away.

many of these comments made by both men and women are emotionally charged, you aren't thinking logically, you are victim-izing yourself, etc etc. well you know, it's just life -- since when was anything fair. obviously, you don't feel like your life is fair and i'm pretty sure your partner doesn't feel like their life is fair either. boo hoo, it's life. figure out a way to get through it together.
Just a passer by
So I was shown the page by a friend who found most of this quite hilarious. I have to say, I agree with him.
I'm a guy and I still see most of these posts as just plain back and forth BS. One side complains about complaints and the other retaliates. Someone said it earlier, Everyone is different. I wont lie. My GF used complain like all hell and I just tell her flatly to stop worrying about the small stuff. I just plainly tell her, If she wants to get anything done, stop complaining and actually speak to me. Some of you other guys need to start just listening to the complaints and actually respond to it. But I must honestly say, We men aren't the most rational beings either. We want the complaints to stop, yet we also add to them. You all cant tell me that you're perfect every day. I know I'm not.

To the so called Complaining Women, Y'all need to start condensing these complaints or something. If something isn't done to your liking. Say it once. don't say it 40 times in a day. We heard you the first time. Instead of asking "Why" ask "How" instead. Because clearly, if you're asking us why it isn't done, You dont seem to know how to do it yourself. Ex: Why isnt this done? -> Could you show me how this can be done properly?

I know I sure as hell would rather show you how to do something so that incase I'm not able to do it, you could do it yourself.

Now dont get me wrong guys. This is no reason for you to sit idly by and let your woman do everything. That's just absurd. Get up and Do things around the house. Im pretty sure alot of you already do and hats off to you for it. Keep up the good work.
To the

Also, to the women that don't complain.
Yes, We men love you. and there's a special place in our hearts for all of you. If only more were like you. Please go educate the rest.


All in all. Yeah, Im sure there's some things to complain about on both sides. But I know for a fact that something didn't sound like a complaint, we'd be more willing to listen. I listen to my gf regardless of what she says. I wont lie, I drown some things out. Its just habit. But I give her the respect enough to stop what I'm doing to at least listen to a majority of it. I would hope you woman would do the same. Because the men who are frustrated on here, yes Frustrated, Are frustrated because alot of you don't know how to plainly say things short and to the point. We'd rather have a conversation with you about what we have seen through the day, than hear 100 questions as to why the water in the sink is too cold.
enhder
I thought these posts were funny. The reason I ended up here is because almost every day my phone has rang and it's the wife. She has complained about the silliest things knowing well that while I'm at work I cannot fix do things at home. So why call me at work instead of waiting for me to get home.
Then there are the riddled way of asking a question in rhetorical form, and in a way that I must someone know immidiately what she is talking about as if I had nothing elso happening in my life.
undissisiveness - Men are not generally picky about many things, we know what we like and don't like. when going out with the lady we compromise what we really want for something that the lady would have. simple till then, but then the lady doesn't know what she wants, so she will ask the man, the man is thinking, I don't care what we have, I just want to eat. meanwhile the following thoughts are going thru his head. If i tell her what I want to really eat, she will not want that and we're gonna spend half an hour going thru a list of what she wants until we get to the A or B options (guys know what A or B is) which we will pick a random letter because we didn't care in the first place.
By the way, that whole like about "women have it hard because we have babies" crap. shub it. adopt. we have to deal with your whinning throughout the 9 months. society favors women and bends over backwards for any women issue that a woman might have. there are no support groups or any aid which favors men. so if we want to complain about the nagging at home on the internet, I say is OK!
Clint Eastwood
Women are the most self centered,vindictive, dictatorial creatures ever to draw breath on Gods green earth!

Sleep with them,then swat them on the butt and show them the door.
Do not marry them unless you enjoy being a cash cow and whipping boy for her insecurities and complaints.

The smartest thing a man can ever do is heed these rules and stay single.

Remember "a man has got to know his limitations"
Clint Eastwood
Another thing men need to bear in mind is that women are status seekers and are more interested in what their women friends think about their boyfriends/husbands/kids that what they themselves think or feel.

Women dont know their own minds..they are like small children who grasp blindly for each new shiny toy thats presented in front of their face.

It is a simple matter for a woman to suddenly decide she doesnt want to be married to her man or tend to her family anymore,she will without provocation or conscience commit infidelity on a whim,and when caught then have the nerve to blame the man for her actions...thats yet another fascinating female charactaristic,a woman is never at fault for anything they do!

Why so many men let their d***s lead them head first (no pun intended) into the dangerous minefield of marriage,risking not only their own sanity,but their wealth and possesions as well is baffling.

My advice to all men is this- Dont do it!

Learn from other peoples mistakes,or suffer the same fate that has befallen them.

Be a man.
aaron
Some interesting points in the article, but it's extremely biased. I'm in a relationship, and everything I do is scrutinized, not maliciously per se, but even so, it's seriously getting me down. I've lost *all* of my old friends (haven't been able to make new ones either as I'm always working) and also feel as though I can't fulfil my desired career path as I simply cant devote the necessary hours needed to succeed, (although everything goes on hold when she's got stuff going on, and I hear about it constantly for weeks after, despite consistently providing support and praise). I don't do things that thrill or excite me anymore. I'd love to visit Australia, Peru, Brazil, climb a mountain or two, see the rainforest - I only get one life to do all this stuff I'd love to do, but I can't see that happening; living in a more desirable post-code or decorating with Laura Ashley wallpaper and having walk-in shower is apparently more important than appreciating the truly breath-taking things life has to offer. Is that really going to feel like such a good decision at 80 years of age when mobility becomes difficult and our senses are faded? So is this what life is about then? Should I just completely change my personality in order to "adjust to the desires and personality" of the person I'm with? I certainly haven't imposed any such conditions on my girlfriend.

Again: "because men find it difficult to adjust to the desires and personality of women"


Nevermind, I best get back to work, wasting this gloriously sunny weekend! I'm earning more money for the deposit on an apartment I can barely afford to live in. I think she's seeing friends today.....


aaron
Whenever women moan about how bad men are, I remember back to my childhood when my mother used to constantly drum into me how much of a bastard my dad was, how my dad was ugly, worthless, how i'd turn into him and so on, all the while constantly screaming blue murder at me, picking me up and dragging me around by my hair until the point of pissing myself, and then comforting me afterwards whilst acting super nice "let me get you a nice drink...", only to do the same again the next day or the day after. Then because my dad was unhappy and felt trapped in a controlling relationship, he starts compensating for it (somehow) by physically abusing and emotionally tormenting me because I am a product of a relationship he's unhappy in. Then because you're having an odd time at home, you're not like the other kids, then they bully you too, so on and so forth.
CULTURE
ITS CULTURAL. Particularly brought about by usurping the feminist movement as industry made lives easier for women in the house through various innovations the greedy at the top layer decided to skim more off everyone else and push women out the house to spur productivity. They expanded the money supply thus their profits. More money chasing basic needs like a roof over your head means the cost of that roof goes up (pure mathematical function). Now its impossible for people to have decent lives without BOTH parties working. Blame yourselves for letting the top 2% control your minds through media. Your women are programmed against you. You both either work to make money or have to essentially deploy stratagem against each other rather than the establishment that OWNS YOU.
Arjun
I'm newly married and my wife gets in bad moods for no apparent reason. The latest - I didn't call her in 2 hours translating in her mind to my not loving or caring for her. When I'm working my a** off here to provide for all her shopping escapades!
frank
I just ended a relationship with a woman with whom I was madly in love with, and she with me, except she would snap from time to time. The loving woman would say unspeakable things to me, close her mind to any attempts at explanations, and often translated words just spoken by me, giving them a totally new meaning and message. She admitted to being bi-polar, and was on medications, which I don't know if they helped. We would do along anywhere from 6 to 9 days, on cloud 9, then without warning, I would be the recipient of harsh words, accusations and everything else in between. I had spoken to my counselor regarding her and her behavior during these episodes, and he stated she sounded like she was almost a person suffering from border line personality disorder. All the symptoms seem to fit, but of course she denies being so afflicted. My most recent attempt in getting through to her left me frustrated and angry, closing this encounter I stated that she was the love of my life, (true) and that I had loved her more than anyone I had been with, (again true), her response was that I never loved her, which so infuriated me as not only did she hear my words, she completely disregarded them and assigned her view (never loving her) to my thoughts. I am saddened beyond by this loss. I know in my head that I was swimming against the tide in trying to have a stable relationship with her, but my heart loved her more than anything. In short I suspect some sort of mental issues exist in us all, but perhaps in woman they are more difficult to suppress. We have all heard the quote. "they are all sisters", which I think is more of a truth then not. Relationships all seem to start out so well, but in most cases, time seems to erode the foundation of sanity. I hope someday to mend this hole, I miss her so much, but know a fix is not to be, well beyond my capabilities. had to share.
disappointed man
I am engaged to this woman, whose demands and complaining is making me think the wedding-planning over. Every time she does not get things her way she goes ballistic and yells and is rude. On the other hand, when I have a problem with something and bring it up gently and rationally, I am told to accept her ways, otherwise I don't love her. I just think that a relationship should be as fair and equal as possible. Since ours obviously isn't and she seems to think that it is her way or the highway, I am considering the highway-since a marriage with that woman would probably be very very difficult to handle.
Pete
My wife complains everyday. She talks shit about me to everybody we know. She is a very unhappy person. When we go out as a family, she seems to hate that me and our kids are having lots of fun. She is an extremely boring person, even our kids have told me that she is boring and she is always in a bad mood. She points out all my mistakes and my faults, but when I do the same to her, she will always deny any fault on her part with excuses. She is always threating to leave me and take the kids away to make me pay child support and that she would never let me see them. That tells me that she doesn't give a shit about her own children's feelings.
Everybody complains (male)
Were both as bad as each other its just that women complain about thibgs that are easily fixed and men complain about things they cant fix for example i bought my girlfriend a bracelet and she constantly complains about how it pinches her and gets caught on stuff? i told her if it annoys you so much dont wear it! which she was quickly to contridict herself and defend the wearing of it... as for men we complain about other peoples behaviours or our job which we have no say in the matter... i complain to my girlfriend i wont lie sometimes she'll listen sometimes she will start complaining over me lol its a give take world.. i was told by my father if it does'nt feel like your doing all the work then its not a real relationship.. my mother and father are still married and have been for 18 years... as the wise Albert Einstein once said "Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
So each is inevitably disappointed"

Love is love ******* deal with it! :)
guy
Circumstances led them to complain?

That's exactly another problem women have. Casting blame elsewhere. Shirking responsibility for their actions. Put a group of men and women in the same trivial circumstance and you won't hear anything from a man except cries for food.

Men, if you love your woman, do not indulge this kind of childish behavior. Like the spoiled kid, they just need to be ignored until they can grow up.

The people you should blame are the women's parents for nurturing this "princess" nonsense and the media/advertisers for capitalizing on their personality defects by selling an endless stream of multi-sensory crap.

But remember, woman are emotional creatures. That's just how it is. Never expect them to reason through things. That's like expecting a child to solve an X-file.

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